Giving and receiving feedback can be a helpful, productive part of a business relationship. But for many people it can conjure up negative feelings of being criticized, second-guessed, or reprimanded. And as hard as it is for a manager to give feedback to a direct report, it’s even more challenging for the direct report to give feedback to their manager—even when they know know it would be helpful for the manager to hear what they have to say.
Have you ever known someone who gave feedback to their boss, who then “killed the messenger”? Maybe it was an honest comment like, “Boss, I think our Thursday afternoon meetings are a waste of time”—and the boss shouted, “What do you mean, ‘a waste of time’? Are you kidding? Those meetings are important!”
It’s clear this self-serving leader didn’t want to hear the truth. Self-serving leaders believe they are too high and mighty to listen to feedback from a subordinate (sub-ordinary) employee.
Servant Leaders Love Getting Feedback
On the other hand, servant leaders love feedback. In fact, they look at it as a gift. As a servant leader, the only reason you are leading is to serve your people—and if someone has suggestions on how you can serve better, you want to hear them.
Giving feedback to the boss doesn’t come naturally to most people—so make yourself approachable and easy to connect with. Assure your people you won’t get defensive and you really want to hear what they have to say.
When receiving feedback, remember that the person is giving you a gift. Make sure the first thing you say is “Thank you.” Then follow up with “This is so helpful.” And then, “Is there anything else you think I should know?” I’ve found that once leaders open the door for feedback from people, they can learn many valuable nuggets of truth they can use to improve their leadership style.
Giving and receiving feedback without judgment is a best practice for any leader who strives to achieve both great relationships and great results. My colleague Rick Tate said it best: “Feedback is the breakfast of champions!”
“Servant Leaders Love Feedback”is Simple Truth #23 in the new book I’ve coauthored with Randy Conley, Simple Truths of Leadership: 52 Ways to Be a Servant Leader and Build Trust. It’s on sale now at your favorite bookstore or online retailer. Go here to download an eBook summary for a sneak preview!